Being a mother of two boys is difficult. First of all, sex disappointment is something real. I know firsthand. It is not really that I don’t love my boys with all my heart, or wish they had been different. I just assumed I’d have a girl, one day. I was adopted and never really knew much about my birth parents.
As the mother of boys, I’ve had to rewrite life’s goals to travel and my dreams to have daughters and sons. In recent years, I’ve tried to come to terms with my emotions by reflecting on why I believe it’s so difficult to mother boys. And for that reason, I have strong feelings about it.
It is not just the toys, the games, the clothes. Although these things are a reflection of issues that lurk beneath the surface. It is also the interests you’ve in common, the connection you expect in the years to come, and even the general comprehension of life experience as a guy versus a woman.
In discovering and realizing my anticipation and my assumptions, I’ve tried to think of ways I will embrace being a mother of boys. I understand this might seem silly to people who have a girl or had never anticipated having a girl.
But I believe this is an essential subject to post about as I’ve had conversations with numerous other boy mothers, and know I’m not alone in this struggle.
I’m doing my best to embrace being a mother of boys. I realize the same issues can come up with mothering daughters but I know that there are women out there who feel like me about being a mother to two boys.
Recently, I have had chats with some other mothers of boys. And although I know mothers with girls and boys can comprehend boys, I think having just boys is not quite the same as having a girl and a boy.
Having chatted with these other moms about these things that run through my mind has been beneficial. I know she knows, what I am going through and, for me, it softens my heart to have these boys moms as good friends close.
I would like to have some hobbies the boys and I can enjoy together in the years to come. Not skateboarding, which they like to do with their dad, and I’ve never felt comfortable doing. Probably nothing with sports or vehicles or superheroes and comic books.
Thus far I’ve not been able to bring myself to become enthusiastic about these things. On my list are scuba diving, rock climbing and golf. But I guess I’ll have to wait for my boys to get older.
I know it’ll be essential to discover a pastime we could enjoy together, therefore we may share these critical discussions and connecting moments as boys grow up.